How To Carry A Well Packed Grudge

Understand What Makes a Grudge
Hate, like love, comes in many flavors and varieties. Grudges require time, dedication, imagination, quick wit and a sharp tongue. The anger that goes into a grudge should be mighty, enduring and, whenever possible, completely irrational.

Pick Your Adverseries With Care
No-one is going to want to hear about your all-consuming vendetta against your ineffectual, elderly neighbor. If possible, ask for references from a would-be grudge-object. Be careful! If you choose poorly, you will cross the line from grudgery, into stalking, which is not covered in this chapter.

Don't Start Grudges Frivously
With careful tending, a grudge can last as long as you live, encompassing your homelife, your career, and your friends and family. Such a commitment is not to be entered into lightly. There is nothing more annoying than carefully hating a person for an extended period, and then realizing that it really didn't matter that they didn't return that CD they borrowed. Again, understand what differs a grudge from a mere sulking fit.

Nurture Your Grudge
Grudges can survive with minimal attention, but they rarely thrive that way. To keep your grudge healthy and sleek, stay focused! Dedicate your spare time to thinking about your grudge and look for new reasons to elevate your dislike of your grudge-object to new heights. Just a few minutes' effort every day can encourage astonishing growth.

Stand Your Ground
From time to time, petty-minded people - such as your loved ones - may try to talk you into dropping your grudge. They will use any reason they can think of, including the death of the object of your hatred, or the complete collapse of your social life. Ignore them! Always keep in mind the fact that your pride is on the line, dammit, and you're not going to be the first to back down.

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