January 27th

Feeling a little bit blah this evening so, of course, I haul out Yestermonth. Everyone has a bad habit, I suppose.

I'm still girding myself for WTFOS. The contract has yet to be settled, but I'm just crossing my fingers and hoping I'm not about to be fucked over after having my hopes raised up. Every day, I realize another facet that needs to be covered, or a problem that I will have to solve. It's added to the list - which is the electronic equivalent of a bunch of scribblings on a cocktail napkin right now - and left to burble in my subconscious for the next few days. I'm a big believer in letting that other 80% of my brain work on things before I try to tackle it with the minority of my brain cells. It might not work for everyone, but I seem to be muddling through all right. 

Of course, I'm still terrified that I'm going to blow this, fuck it all up totally and go down in flames. I suspect that feeling will remain until, oh, three days after the project is produced, premiered and being sold in shiny plastic boxes. 

No, I have not seen Adaptation yet, despite recommendations. I suspect it would cut just a wee bit too close to the bone.

***

The year is new-ish, spring is sort of coming and, unsurprisingly, friends are talking of leaving the Bay Area. I'm not surprised. Companies are re-locating, and real-estate is out of control. Families have to decide if they want to sell all their major organs, or keep paying $1400/month for a two-bedroom apartment. Silly us, we thought rents would fall when the economy. 

(The sixteen pound cat on my lap is insisting that nothing can be that bleak while he's around. He might well be right)

So, there's speculations about moving. Some people are wondering if they should go. Others are wondering what will happen in their absence. I just want to whack them all on the butt with a comically-shaped plank and yell "Stop talking and git going, dammit!" It's not that I want them to leave, but I would love to see 'em progress and grow - preferably without too much agonizing in the process. 

Friends, I assure you. Those of us who remain in the bay area - be it through choice or lack of same - will survive. We'll probably miss you but the world is full of these little sorrows. Don't let your doubt of what-might-be stop you from going. For heaven's sake, don't fear that we're all going to fall apart without you. Just go. At least one of us will be engaged in activity and breaking free of stagnation.

There's stability and stagnation. Lately I've had just barely enough of the former, way too much of the latter. I'm glad I can tell the difference, otherwise I might stagnate right into a coma. With luck, one will soon convert to the other - and in the proper direction.

***

Thinking about it, there are a lot of movies that I haven't seen, that I want to see... Being Jon Malkovitch, Talk To Her, My Big Fat Greek Wedding, Schindler's List, Equilibrium Grosse Point Blank, Oh Brother Where Art Thou? And those are just the ones I can remember off the top of my head...


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